WEST SEATTLE, Washington, October 31, 2009 (WSFB) ““ With the recent increase of swine flu related sicknesses and death the regular flu is feeling unwanted and somewhat jealous heading into late Fall.

“I was always top dog around from roughly November to February,” the regular flu told the WSFB.   “My shit hits people pretty hard, but once that swine motherfucker came out of fucking nowhere he stole my thunder.”

While regular flu vaccinations are readily available the swine flu vaccinations are in short supply, obviously a sign that they are incredibly hot right now.

“The swine flu is hotter that Jon and Kate, Brad and Angelina, or even Obama,” entertainment critic Julie Snoorgard said.   “Expect the swine flu to be on all the covers in the next few months, People, SI, even Vogue.”

Recently it was rumored that the regular flu would be featured in a 50 cent rap song where it strongly disses the swine flu, including insulting the swine flu’s mother and saying it “doesn’t give a fuck about the swine flu” and will “fuck the swine flu up with a glock 9 hammer.”

The swine flu had no comment as it was busy ravaging the young, old and those with underlying health conditions.