WEST SEATTLE, Washington, May 26, 2009 (WSFB) – At 6:08PM PDT today the first customer ready Boeing 787 aircraft was released from its protective crate and allowed to roam about Fauntleroy Park park under its own free will.

“We’re very pleased with the performance of this aircraft” boasts Larlg Gnamlemhen, lead engineer for the Free Will Airborne Control System (FWACS). “We just made history with the world’s first sentient plane that can make critical decisions with lightining speed and flawless precision, effectively making the aging pilot ranks obsolete” continued Gnamlemhen.

The 787 fits into a larger scheme in terms of the future of aerospace.

The Advanced Worldwide Flight Uniform Collision Avoidance Array (AWFUCCA) will utilize existing satellite and ground based communication relay technologies to provide a blanket of logistic and communications data to the 787 fleet, thereby providing all necessary stimuli to the FWACS on board and eliminating the need for a flight crew.

No other aerospace company in the world will be able to utilize this technology unless they apologize to the United States for being rude to the people that saved their butts back in WWII.