Archive for the Category ‘Local’
Written by Jonah Gabriel Stonewater
Local
Feb 9, 2012
WEST SEATTLE, Washington, February 9, 2012 (WSFB) – So now we’re back to Psycho Santorum.
Newt won’t back down even though he didn’t even make the ballot in Missouri.
Mittens is a retard that is too busy pulling punches, flip flopping, being confused, and all around wanting to bring a big knife and shove it into our [...]
Written by Pete Seazle
Local
Feb 3, 2012
WEST SEATTLE, Washington, February 3, 2012 (WSFB) – To follow up on other “news media’s” scoop on this developing story, the West Seattle Funblog has learned that sea life violence is escalating on the peninsula, specifically around beach areas, and it’s not exactly in ways what one might think.
While authorities focus on hunters and miscreants [...]
Written by Jonah Gabriel Stonewater
Local
Feb 2, 2012
WEST SEATTLE, Washington, February 2, 2012 (WSFB) – I read in the paper today that some broad got her panties in a twist when one of her daughters (on a so called, “mother/daughter outing to the library” which is code for “dad’s at the bar and doesn’t want to deal with my woman nagging shit [...]
Written by Pete Seazle
Local
Feb 1, 2012
WEST SEATTLE, Washington, February 1, 2012 (WSFB) – If you pay attention to modern advertising, then you’ve probably heard that Axe Body Spray is all you need to get women to adore you.
Further, if you’ve run into a homeless person lately, you’ve probably noticed that homeless people can have a certain… fragrance.
This isn’t a slight [...]
Written by Pete Seazle
Local
Jan 30, 2012
SEATTLE, Washington, January 30, 2012 (WSFB) – The City of Seattle began removing homeless people who are currently living below the Alaskan Way Viaduct at 8:00 this morning. This move is part of preparing the area for tunnel boring and is considered a matter of “public safety”.
The City claims the operation will be organized and [...]
Written by Pete Seazle
Local
Jan 30, 2012
WHITE CENTER, Washington, January 30, 2012 (WSFB) – Justin Bieber is clearly not the first white rapper. That title is commonly, though mistakenly, credited to Vanilla Ice. The real first white rapper was in fact Blondie’s Deborah Harry, as evidenced by 1981’s smash hit, “Rapture”.
But Harry is not the has-been opening a Vietnamese restaurant in [...]
Written by Jonah Gabriel Stonewater
Local
Jan 26, 2012
WEST SEATTLE, Washington, January 26, 2012 (WSFB) – We managed to survive with the majority of our dignity intact from this snowclysm, and some folk are still without power!
Once again it’s been proven to us that the fact that we can’t handle the snow can be attributed to the hills, the misappropriation and ill use [...]
Written by Pete Seazle
Local
Jan 25, 2012
WEST SEATTLE, Washington, January 25, 2012 (WSFB) – Traffic at the West Seattle Junction has been snarled of late. The intersection of California and Alaska is the new home of street performer Guiseppe Manning and his organ, which he grinds.
Manning, uncle of West Seattle Funblog intern Lothario Manning, was issued his street performers license last [...]
Written by Pete Seazle
Local
Jan 23, 2012
WEST SEATTLE, Washington, January 23, 2012 (WSFB) – Earlier in our Funblogging career, the West Seattle Funblog issued a community service piece aimed at better hygiene during the current near-pandemic pandemonium surrounding H1N1 (Swine Flu) as well as other forms of nastiness associated with deteriorating weather.
“The Hygienic FistBump” taught our readers of the relative cleanliness of the knuckles [...]
Written by Jonah Gabriel Stonewater
Local
Jan 19, 2012
WEST SEATTLE, Washington, January 19, 2012 (WSFB) – Jonah Gabriel Stonewater could have written an article this week, but to protest the current tone of internet gestapo measures, he’s not. But he had this to say:
This is what freedom of speech and freedom of creativity over the internet would be in this dystopian terror future.
Welcome [...]