Archive for the Category ‘National’
Written by Pete Seazle
National
Jun 22, 2011
The West Seattle Funblog has obtained an exclusive interview with Rep. Anthony Weiner and hopes to finally put this story, and its accompanying plethora of dick jokes, to bed.
WEST SEATTLE, Washington, June 22, 2011 (WSFB) – We’ve all followed the trials and tribs of Rep. Anthony Weiner (D-NY).
We’ve watched his public defleecing and laid an [...]
Written by luigilinguini
National
Jun 9, 2011
WEST SEATTLE, Washington, June 09, 2011 (WSFB) – The fledgling presidential campaign of former Speaker of the House, Newt Gingrich, was dealt a stunning blow when at least six senior campaign staff members resigned today.
Gingrich, who announced his candidacy via the popular social networking site Twitter, took the news in stride.
“This is when you level [...]
Written by luigilinguini
National
Jun 9, 2011
WEST SEATTLE, Washington, June 09, 2011 (WSFB) – The nation’s women are responding to the call for increased female presence across all tiers of government in unprecedented numbers following the “Weinergate” scandal that broke earlier this week.
West Seattle in particular witnessed a 400% increase in ballot applications from women interested in running for everything from [...]
Written by Killboy Powerhead
National
Jun 1, 2011
DES MOINES, Iowa, June 01, 2011 (AFB) – In an early morning press conference held in a Des Moines area Luby’s, my dick ended months of speculation and confirmed that it will seek the Republican presidential nomination in 2012.
“I have been humbled by all of the encouragement you’ve given me,” said my dick. “I stand [...]
Written by Pete Seazle
National
May 9, 2011
WEST SEATTLE, Washington, May 09, 2011 (WSFB) – The 2012 Presidential Election is but a mere 18 months away. Now is when things really start to heat up! Potential candidates test the shark-infested waters to see if they can make a legitimate push for the Oval Office.
Will they do well in the Iowa Caucuses? Are [...]
Written by Pete Seazle
National
Mar 9, 2011
CAMBRIDGE, Massachusetts, March 9,2011 (WSFB) – White House Drug Czar and former Seattle Police Chief Gil Kerlikowski fainted not once, but twice yesterday during an official visit to the Boston area which included a speaking engagement at Harvard University.
Details are sketchy at best, especially since we don’t do much research here at the Funblog, but [...]
Written by Jonah Gabriel Stonewater
National
Feb 3, 2011
SAN FRANCISCO, California, February 3, 2011 (WSFB) – In unrelated news today, astronomers have their eyes fixed on the next out worldly threat that could kill us all!
This time there’ll be no take-backsies, for when scientists found the huge comet that started to curve into our neighborhood of space, they immediately broke the news to [...]
Written by sonny seattle
National
Jan 28, 2011
WEST SEATTLE, Washington, January 28, 2011 (WSFB) – Thousands of irate protesters hit the streets of Mexico City today when new photos from NASA’s Hubble Space Telescope were recently released of the dramatic Sombrero Galaxy, located 28 million light-years from Earth. NASA’s Hubble website states, “This brilliant galaxy was named the ‘Sombrero’ because of its [...]
Written by sonny seattle
National
Jan 12, 2011
WEST SEATTLE, Washington, January 12, 2011 (WSFB) – Iconic New York City real estate tycoon and TV star Donald Trump, a.k.a. The Donald, announced he may run for president in 2012 as a Republican. And while he may carry more personal baggage than a Boeing 747, political insiders speculate that voters may begrudge him his [...]
Written by Pete Seazle
National
Jan 6, 2011
WEST SEATTLE, Washington, January 6, 2010 (WSFB) – As winter has settled across our nation, headlines have shifted from those of blistering heat to odes of snow and tundra.
Holiday travelers have been left stranded on tarmacs without adequate drinkcartmanship. Mayors of shithole New Jersey towns have been shoveling snow for press. And Natalie Portman is [...]