OAK BROOK, Illinois, February 8, 2012 (WSFB) – McDonald’s Restaurants are bringing back the McRib later this year. And in advance of what is surely to be a massive ad campaign, Mickey D’s is conducting an advertising prequel to dispel any concerns over the quality of meat it is using.
“Even though it’s in the shape [...]
MIAMI, Florida, January 31, 2012, (WSFB) – As the Mitt Romney campaign revels in its smugness over its current poll standings in Florida, underdog GOP Presidential candidate Newt Gingrich isn’t pulling any punches.
Yesterday, with less than 24 hours remaining before the increasingly important Florida Primary, Gingrich named his running mate for Vice President…
Floridian, Casey Anthony.
Typically, [...]
WASHINGTON, D.C., January 27, 2012 (WSFB) - According to a recent report, President Obama is so engrossed with the republican primaries that he’s forgotten all his responsibilities as Commander in Chief.
“He spends all day watching Fox News,” said White House press secretary Jay Carney, “we’re a little worried. I keep telling him he has to [...]
MACLEAN, Virginia, January 20, 2012 (WSFB) – It was discovered today that Newt Gingrich literally constructed his own moral universe, mostly built out of mirrors, birch bark, and headshots.
“It’s amazing,” confirmed one reporter, verifying the find. “When you walk inside, it’s impossible to be wrong. No matter where you stand, you always have the moral [...]
THE MOON, SOMEWHERE OVER WEST SEATTLE, Washington, January 13, 2012 (WSFB) – Ron Paul’s bid for the Republican Presidential nomination has slipped of late, most likely due to his campaign strategy.
Said Campaign Adviser Kevin Johnson, “We told Ron that our time would be best spent in New Hampshire and South Carolina as these early primaries are important [...]
CHARLESTON, South Carolina, January 6, 2012 (WSFB) – Michelle Bachman announced today that she was very disappointed Rick Perry did not also exit the race like he promised her he would. “We had a pact,” she said, referencing an old Seinfeld episode. “I told him I would only exit the race if he did. We [...]
PHOENIX, Arizona, December 30, 2011 (WSFB) – In Michelle Bachmann’s absolutely ridiculous and preposterous bid for the Republican Presidential nomination, pandering to minorities seems to have become the norm.
Little known outside the confines of northern Arizona, Bachmann held a Pajama Party a couple of months ago and reached out to our neighbors to the south.
“I [...]
WEST SEATTLE, Washington, December 23, 2011 (WSFB) – Perhaps you’ve seen the face of Jesus on a tortilla or in a painting of Christ. Maybe it was tears of blood leaking from the eyes of the Virgin Mary in statue form.
Either way, there are countless anomalies and aberrations associated with Christianity that you’ve at least heard of, [...]
AUSTIN, New New Mexico, Diciembre 9, 2011 (WSFB) – They say that becoming President is a full time job and they’re right. You have to campaign long and hard if you want your party’s nomination, let alone a desk in the oval office. But what if you already have a full time job?
Texas Governor Rick [...]
AKRON, Ohio, November 30, 2011 (WSFB) – While it is now being reported worldwide that seven Amish in Ohio are under arrest for hate crime hair attacks, the WSFB has learned through the grapevine, literally, that Amish women are now shaving to show solidarity with the men-folk.
We decided to fly to Akron, Ohio, then rent [...]
