WANTED: Male/Female to exercise and couple swap with. Must be extremely fit and preferably spray-tanned to resemble a roasted turkey. Blondes preferred; bleached or highlighted hair acceptable. Bonus if male has bleached boy-band hair. Bonus if female has Brazilian bikini wax AND acrylic nails. Us: fun, fit, vegan, robot-faced (male). You: fun, fit, no aversions [...]
AUSTIN, Texas, May 3, 2010 (WSFB-AC) – If success could be measured by a “never give up” attitude and a beaming black smile that somewhat resembles the Penguin from Batman, then Arnie Huginkiss would be the most successful man on the planet.
Most people don’t realize there were originally five members of the world famous heavy [...]
AUSTIN, Texas, April 22, 2010 (WSFB-AC) – If you only had a single pair of socks, one of the little fuckers would still go astray sooner or later. It’s inevitable. Socks disappear. But we have lots of socks, so we don’t bitch or wonder; we just move on and let the mystery propagate.
Have you ever [...]
AUSTIN, Texas, April 20, 2010 (WSFB-AC) – What does the celebration of 4/20 have to do with Hitler? Well, nothing. But since Hitler was born on 4/20, and it is well documented that he had quite a little meth and cocaine habit; could a simple drug change to the giggle weed have dramatically altered the [...]
AUSTIN, Texas, April 14, 2010 (WSFB-AC) – Take one part Jo Anne Worley, stir in some Stooges, add a pinch of the lord, a dash of some blasphemous erotica… and you’ve got the hottest all-girl band to hit the airwaves in years!
The Faith Tones!
Known for playing impromptu gigs at hometown Piggly Wigglies, these Arkansas natives [...]
Wanted: Single girls, age not important, (if you’re old enough to bleed, you’re old enough to breed) for fun play time. Must enjoy Barbies and all things pink and pretty.
About me: Very in touch with my feminine side. TV celebrity- have been on MSNBC’s “To Catch A Predator, Season 3” and “Intervention”. The right girl [...]
HOLLYWOOD, California, March 22, 2010 (WSFB-AC) – Pretty Pony member and beloved children’s icon, Rainbow Dash, is facing certain jail time after being arrested last week for public intoxication, colorful rainbow vomiting, and false impersonation.
Dash was taken into custody at the California border town of Tijuana, trying to re-enter the United States after being turned [...]
WASHTINGTON, D.C., March 4, 2010 (WSFB-AC) – After a thirty-year investigation by the DEA, arrests have been made to key members of the popular TV shows The Love Boat and Fantasy Island. The investigation has revealed that the popular back-to-back TV shows watched by every loser sitting at home on a Saturday night were in reality fronts [...]
AUSTIN, Texas, January 11, 2010 (WSFB-AC) - So many of us suffer through corporate buzzwords at our jobs. We learn to fit in by speaking in a bizarre language that few of us truly understand. As a benefit to the community at large, I have compiled a list of some frequently used workplace phrases, their translations, [...]
NEW YORK, New York, December 14, 2009, (WSFB-AC) – Although it has resurfaced again recently with the news of Tiger and his wood and Jon and his Gosselin, the problem of men’s wandering appendages is nothing new. To the rescue comes Bronco Products, LTD, with their new line of men’s LockDown ® underwear.
LockDown ® Underwear [...]
