WEST SEATTLE, Washington, November 30, 2009 (WSFB) – We here at the West Seattle Funblog are not so full of ourselves that we avoid the kitchen for the heat. It seems that our, nay my, Panhandler’s Primer sparked the ire of one particular homeless person living in West Seattle.
“Billie” lives on the streets. “She” doesn’t approve [...]
JT -
I’m a local West Seattleite who takes great pride in patronizing local businesses, but I recently bought some dog food at the South Center Petco because I was in the area…..driving through.
Does this make me a Benedict Arnold of sort?
BA
Dear Ben,
Moral dilemmas such as this are really out of my area of expertise. I’ve [...]
Your Weekly Horoscope
- by Patty Seazle
Capricorn: (Dec 22-Jan 19)
Fortunately life insurance policies don’t exclude death benefits for those who die of venereal diseases, as a significant high percentage do. Gaseous clouds have been detected around Uranus.
Aquarius: (Jan 20-Feb 18)
You can turn the world on with your smile. Accept love and chocolate graciously. Have you been [...]
SAN FRANCISCO, California, November 30, 2009 (WSFB-AC) – Recent evidence has surfaced proving once and for all what we have long suspected about the game of soccer: it’s here, and it’s queer.
Theories of soccer’s homosexuality first surfaced in 1983 when then 9th grader Kevin Johnson skipped the school basketball tryouts in favor of the fledgling [...]
ORLANDO, Florida, November 30, 2009 (WSFB) – He’s back. He’s black. He golfs and shloinks super-Swede models. Life is good.
Yet, times are tough in Florida for golfing’s own self-appointed Master of Kickassmanship, Tiger Woods.
Thanksgiving usually ends with pumpkin pie and a nap, but this year marked something different for the Woods household. Black Friday now [...]
WEST SEATTLE, Washington, Noveomberlkj 28, 2009098 (wsfB) – Your Mom seems to think funblog is #1. Yesssssssss. She say “yesssssssss do it again” and we’re all like “ok” and do it again.
When Your Mom came to us the other day we were all like “I guess” but now we’re all like “yessssssss”.
Sometimes Your Mom comes [...]
WEST SEATTLE, Washington, November 27, 2009 (WSFB) – A local “doctor” has been prescribing walnut bourbon as a cure for what ails you, and has the backing of local indigenous people.
“Walnut boubon has all the primary properties of a natural cure-all; walnuts and bourbon,” explains Dr. Roxxo. “I’m a firm believer in anything that contains [...]
Dear JT,
I recently hired a new secretary. I guess “Administrative Assistant” is the politically correct word these days. It has been quite a while since I’ve hired a new employee, and I know a lot has changed in the modern workforce, especially for dames. I am uncertain about etiquette and best practices in bringing a [...]
WEST SEATTLE, Washington, November 27, 2009 (WSFB) - In political-esque news, the daughter of former Vice President Richard “Dick” Cheney gave birth to a baby girl last Wednesday. The family released the following statement:
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“Former Vice President Dick Cheney and his wife, Lynne Cheney, welcomed their seventh grandchild, Sarah Lynne Cheney, Wednesday, November 18, 2009. She weighed 6 [...]
WEST SEATTLE, Washington, November 26, 2009 (WSFB) – For those who believe the Republican party is dead, just try to check out a copy of Michael Moore’s film Sicko from any Seattle Public Library and you will be reminded of their influence.
It has come to our attention that more than 50% of the available copies [...]
