Archive for ‘August, 2009’
Written by luigilinguini
Local
Aug 30, 2009
WEST SEATTLE, Washington, August 30, 2009 (WSFB) – The first annual Summer of Blog comes to a close this week as we move from August to September, and from Summer to Late Summer. Seasonal transitions are an excellent time for reflection and providing the back story, especially when there’s so much to look back upon.
Here’s [...]
Written by Pete Seazle
Local
Aug 29, 2009
WEST SEATTLE, Washington, August 29, 2009 (WSFB) – A new lobbying group based in West Seattle has voiced its opinion on what to do about the viaduct. In a nutshell, they don’t give a shit. Just ask Gordy Lavaca of Admiral.
“Honestly, we live in paradise. Why the hell would we ever want to leave? We’ve [...]
Written by Pete Seazle
Local
Aug 28, 2009
WEST SEATTLE, Washington, August 28, 2009 (WSFB) – The Tully’s at Fauntleroy and California was the scene of a massive fire this morning when Eddie Vedder came in for his daily caramel macchiato. Besides being a less-than-manly drink, beverage preparation involves the use of a small flame-throwing device, for caramelization, with licenses issued and regulated [...]
Written by luigilinguini
Local
Aug 27, 2009
WEST SEATTLE, Washington, August 27, 2009 (WSFB) – The WSFB would like to welcome our newest sponsor – Your Mom – to the growing list of sponsors.
Your Mom gave you life and took care of you growing up. Your Mom made sure you were fed and clothed and loved even when you were the fattest [...]
Written by luigilinguini
Local
Aug 27, 2009
WEST SEATTLE, Washington, August 27, 2009 (WSFB) – The White Center RIGHTNOW resistance movement has struck their first blow against their aggressive annex-happy neighbor to the south, Burien, by knocking a power substation offline and affecting more than 4,000 would be invaders.
Earlier this afternoon after the Burien One World Council announced they’d come to a [...]
Written by luigilinguini
Local
Aug 26, 2009
WEST SEATTLE, Washington, August 26, 2009 (WSFB) – A local blog announced today that they have been officially pimped by Washington’s largest news organization.
When asked how they feel about all their hard work the non-breadwinner stated, “oh hell yesssssssssss!” to which the breadwinner replied, “mmmmhmmm. bling.”
The first thing local blog is planning on using their [...]
Written by T4Toby
Local
Aug 26, 2009
WEST SEATTLE, Washington, August 26, 2009 (WSFBWCC) – An Arbor Heights wo/man is trying to determine if s/he has any legal recourse after obtaining a sex change operation while on holiday in Thailand, a country world-renowned for its gender-reassignment prowess.
Inspired by Barack Obama’s stirring words, Brynjard Ã…ysteinsen decided that the one thing that was not [...]
Written by luigilinguini
Local
Aug 25, 2009
WEST SEATTLE, Washington, August 25, 2009 (WSFB) – The WSFB has learned of a savage plot where assassins from Fatmanistan are expected to target a local musical group with “headshots”.
Headshots are typically accomplished by a long range high power rifle shot to the head, but can also be performed at close range with other weaponry. [...]
Written by luigilinguini
Local
Aug 25, 2009
WEST SEATTLE, Washington, August 25, 2009 (WSFB) – Local authorities released an alert to the general West Seattle Metropolitan area today advising residents to be very cautious and to protect their back door avenues of entry.
With the down economy came an increase in back door activity. As local residents struggled to make ends meet, they [...]
Written by T4Toby
Local
Aug 24, 2009
WEST SEATTLE, Washington, August 24, 2009 (WSFBWCC) – Today we welcome a new sponsor, Yup-B-Gone, maker of the exciting new product the Yuppie Bed Trap. Proprietor Emppu Veli-Pekka explains his business: “With the anticipated influx of yuppies now that Burien has annexed White Center, there has never been a better time to get on [...]